The 25 Words Every Redneck Toddler Needs to Know

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I was reading an article today about vocabulary terms kids should know by the time he/she hits the two year old mark.  Researchers use the two year mark as a starting point for the testing of developmental disorders, such as deafness, autism, dyslexia, etc.  Children at or near this age should understand words such as:  hi, bye, mommy, daddy, cat, dog, and so on (you can see the rest of the list through the link at the bottom).  If not, it could mean that your child could have some mental development issues or could just be your child is prepping for a life of professional athletic prowess.

I agree that some of the words from the list are important for a normal baby to recognize, but I spent a lot of my youth in the south where the language is, um, a bit different.  There is no way for southerners to compare their kids to the list presented by the Child Study Institute at Bryn Mawr College.  Therefore, I’ve made a list to handle the largest portion of non-English speaking Americans.  This is the first list of 25 words/terms that your 2-year-old country bumpkin should know.

So, I’ve compiled a list of the 25 words your budding redneck boy or gal should know along with a brief definition or english translation.  If your son or daughter cannot repeat/understand any of the words below, take the whiskey bottle away from your child for a few hours and try again.

1. Maw – equivalent to mother.
2. Paw – equivalent to father.
3. Mamaw – equivalent to grandmother.
4. Pappee – equivalent to grandfather.
5. Bubba – term for brother.  Sometimes used as a term for any male.
6. Sissy – term for sister.
7. Cuddins – relatives.  Example:  It’s aright for cuddins to kiss.
8. Yall – means you all.  Also, commonly used to refer to one person.
9. Yous – the plural form of you.  More strongly directed form of Yall.
10. Arraz – equivalent to ours.  Emphasis is on the 1st syllable.  Example:  When we marry arraz cuddins, we stay kin.
11. Dem – equivalent to them or those.  Example:  Dem critters is still food.  Just wash dem up and toss dem in da oven.
12. Warsh – to clean.  Example:  We warsh the baby same time as the dawg, once a month!
13. Ignant – equivalent to ignorant.  Example:  Don’t be ignant!  Wrasslin is real!
14. Sodeepop – carbonated beverage, such as Pepsi, Coke,or Cactus Juice
15. Skeeter – equivalent to mosquito.  Example:  These dang skeeters is bitin’ me all up on my nayk.
16. Aye-rab – any person of color.  Example:  Amerka has its first aye-rab prezdent, Obama.
17. Larnin – education.  Example:  We gots to get sum larnin if we gonna geet jobs.
18. Vittles – food.  Example:  Boy! Stop tossin’ them vittles at the dawg and eat’em up yur sef.
19. Coon – equivalent to racoon.  Example:  We dun cawt us two coons for suppa!
20. Raffle – gun or firearm.  Example:  I see coons!  Quick, gimme dat raffle!
21. Fixin – term for “going to” or “getting ready to”.  Example:  I’m fixin to whoop dat skweelin baby!
22. Treller – home or house.  Example:  My maw and paw live in separate trellers, but least dem’s in the same treller park!
23. Winna – equivalent to window.  Example:  My camaro’s got natural a/c.  Just crack the winna and feel that cool air.
24. Ricin – NASCAR.  Example:  Lemme git my lucky #3 hat on, cuz it’s car ricin weekend!
25. Laff – equivalent to life.  Example:  The happiest 3 years of my laff wuz spent in 10th grade.