May 2011
Barely over a month into fatherhood. Sleep deprived and brain dead, I decided to test my mental acuity this morning.
Trying to find a simple way to gauge brain activity, I quizzed myself with this:
Put a banana near a non-banana. Close eyes. Open eyes. Pick up the object you think most closely resembles a banana and eat it.

Come On Worm, Don’t Be Sore at Me! I Had a 50:50 Chance!
I guessed correctly. Whew! It would have been difficult to explain to authorities why my baby had a bite-sized chunk missing from his hairy little forehead…