Worm, I promise you’ll get to love your baths. Right now though, just try to imagine you’re on the sunny sandy beaches of Jamaica with the warm ocean water lapping at your feet…
Dad, If This is Jamaica, Where the Hell is my Rum Punch?!
May 2011
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After all that eating, we gotta be sleeping! Me napping with my new best friend!
The Art of the Perfect Nap!
May 2011
I’ve been busy. That’s my excuse for GPOD grinding to a halt. It was a great idea back in March…but then life got in the way. So my new year’s resolution is to keep all the kids’ media organized (kind of like my brain) from the start. I’m bringing this branch of MVG back to life. And I’ll be adding one for Smush…so bear with me while I fast forward through this past year of Worm’s life! And the pics will all get a date stamp.
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May 2011
This is like one of those “Come on guys. What the hell are you doing with me?” pictures.
He’ll appreciate it when he is older and can reflect on this picture…or maybe not.
Since I Can’t Control My Face Muscles, I’ll Just Tell You. I’m Giving You the Stink Eye.
Please forgive me, I couldn’t post this beforehand. The paparazzi would have staked themselves outside our hotel room the entire time and we would have graced the cover of US Weekly without getting paid for it! (Ah, the life of a celebrity…)
When I think of Las Vegas, the first thing that comes to mind is “Wow, I can’t believe I’m thinking about the shrimp eating capital of the United States.” And when I have dreams of myself snorkeling from one slot machine to the next in the hopes I could jackpot a lifetime supply of shrimp with just one pull of the lever, it’s time for a shrink a visit.
Las Vegas built a direct road to San Diego. Scratch that, San Diego built a direct road to Las Vegas. (It’s part of the reason why our city is broke.) One freeway, the I-15, whisks you over the hills and through the woods desert to the place where the fourth largest pyramid in the world resides. (If you’re visiting from space, hover directly over the vertical light beam in the sky and descend. It will take you right to the center.)
When I was younger and had time, money, and energy, Vegas was a fun place to let my single self cavort and run wild. “Sleep during the day and party at night” was the motto. Funny. Now that I look back, I don’t remember seeing any babies or toddlers in Vegas. (In my mid-twenties, I probably couldn’t tell you what a toddler was, let alone spot one in public.) Today, I know why you don’t see a lot of young families like mine in a place like Las Vegas. Would you still view Vegas the same way if the consequences of your sins committed there were standing next to you on the people mover? Watching a poor sap like me lugging a 50-lb bag of diapers, a stroller full of toddler screams, and schlepping a tired, worn-out pregnant woman from casino to casino would make any sane man question his free-wheeling motives! So, strollers and babies are forced to navigate the “Strip” more covertly…through the service and maintenance routes.
2.9 Members of the MVG clan!
I’m on the other side of the Stratosphere now, and I’ve had to begrudgingly change my Vegas habits to a more G-Rated, all ages version. Wake up at 6:30am. Nap time at noon. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner time scheduled around pregnancy munchies and Worm’s occasional desire to eat. Squeeze all that in by 8pm and everyone’s happy…almost. During our three-day stay, I saw more of my hotel room than I have in all the other times I’ve visited combined. Not the most fun for me, but I sacrifice my own joys in life to be with my family.
During Thanksgiving, Vegas gets much fewer visitors. This time of year isn’t hard to find a great hotel package deal for the whole clan. We haven’t been on a vacation since before Worm was hatched. It was a perfect opportunity to test out the little guy’s portability and travel manners during the “terrible twos” period. Besides, the thick walls of these hotel rooms can muffle sounds from the most unhappy toddlers.
I found Vegas to be surprisingly kid-friendly. There’s a ton to do. If your kid is bored in Vegas, consider the clergy for them. The mobsters running the Boulevard (just kidding, please don’t shoot me) know that Vegas runs in two shifts (day and midnight) and never the twain shall meet. Every day well before the witching hour, we hit the pool, the buffets, and the Strip. On the last day, we blazed through the Mandalay Bay Shark Reef Aquarium in about 10 minutes. (We were overstimulated, ready for nap time, and our brain had shut down…we were out of sins and ready for home. We = Worm.)
Though I had plenty of misdeeds left in me, Worm was right. Out of time and Thanksgiving turkey, we left Paradise (Clark County) and headed for home. It was a nice detour from reality, if only for a few days.
Looks Like Someone Was Enjoying the Mandalay Bay Exhibits
If you’re wondering, Worm racked up the 11 hours of driving in excellent condition. He was a great travel companion. When strapped down, he was easy to talk to and didn’t once try to escape my lecture on “Why Vegas is Called Sin City”. We managed without shoving a TV, iPod, iPad, or laptop computer in his face. (Yes, I’m amazed too.)
Finally Able to Catch Some Z’s! Vegas was Awesome!
Gavin – 19; Dad – 9 (From the pictures, it looks like you got the Vegas thing down pat, Worm. Good job!)
We just had our 30 week ultrasound and we are excited! There’s a little girl in mommy’s belly (and coincidentally, Worm tells us he has a baby in his belly, as well) and she’s doing great. According to the statistics, her head is normal size (50th percentile) and more oval-shaped than round (a good thing for women birthing the boring way), her arms and legs are freakishly long (95th percentile), and she’s rocking a mini-mohawk (8th percentile). The bubbling cauldron of ultrasound images stirred up by my distorted mind form a baby as tall as Worm with blue-dyed hair and piercings. So indelible is the vision, that anything other coming down the chute and “Oh, I don’t think that one is ours.” may be my insert-foot-in-mouth response to the doctors holding her up for me to see.
I love her already, curved barbells and all. For the past 8 months that I’ve been bearing the wife’s empathetic baby weight, the nausea, the tiredness, the dancing on my bladder and ovaries, my baby girl and I have bonded as only an emotionally unstable gifted and caring father and daughter would. And yesterday after the ultrasound, I had a fatherly revelation of sorts (this time it wasn’t one of the many that come after “Shit, I probably shouldn’t have done that.”). #2 now has a nickname to one day despise, like when she’s walking across the stage to pick up her college degree and mom and I are in the audience screaming it out at the top of our lungs and the crowd is erupting with laughter and jeers…We will tell her afterwards that she should be grateful that we didn’t nickname her “bubby wubby pants”.
The pet name of the newest member of the family will heretoforth move from “#2” to “Smush”. As of this day, 2012, Thursday (I think) November 15th, I now pronounce you husb…I now christen thee Smush, mother of none, daughter of dad, sister of Worm, and the female-version of the master of the Universe!
From today until eternity (or until Steph the Supreme Commander says otherwise), you shall be the Smush.
Other nicknames in the running, but ultimately NOT chosen:
- Wormette
- Slug
- the Cuddly Wuddly Wompa Monster
- Cutiest Patootiest Lovie Bear Sweetsie Muffin Dandy Candy Pansie Rose Petal…I couldn’t even type that without vomiting…twice.
- Chainsaw Massacre slasher chick
When you look at the ultrasound pics below, think Empire Strikes Back “Han Solo Frozen in Carbonite” scene. Ah, you can see Smush’s face now, can’t you?
With Nose, Lips, and Chin Pushed Up Against the Womb, What Other Nickname Would She Have?
…other than the lottery!
Liebster Award!
In case you don’t know, the Liebster award is a blogger to blogger award to share the love of the blogosphere. I received this nice shout-out from:
http://adventuresinjedi.wordpress.com
In order to accept it, I’ve got to nominate 3 other blogs so that my readers can visit and connect with other blogs that I find dear. I’ve also got to answer 10 very, very personal questions and make a list of questions for the next winners.
I’m terribly humbled as well as surprised at the same time. I really thought that people accidentally stumbled onto my daddyblog when their babies poked the right keys on mommy’s iPad. I’m still shocked that people actually visit MVG…on purpose!
Without further ado, here are answers to the 10 questions asked of me:
- What do you think makes a good blog? I think a good blog touches the heart and tickles the fancy.
- What made you start blogging? I needed a way to let family and friends see my son Gavin grow up…as well as find something to keep my unyielding type A personality content.
- Cat person or dog person? I’ve got two dogs and one of them would eat cats daily if we let him. To reduce the bloodbath, kitty treats are restricted to weekends only. That should be all you need to figure out the answer to this question.
- If you could change anything, anything at all, with the world as it is, what would it be and why? I would wish for more tolerance in the world. Tolerance for one another’s differences would make the world a better place for cute little puppies and stuff.
- What’s your favourite thing? Driving my Land Cruiser barefoot. Umm, I mean it’s a tie between my wife and my child.
- Popcorn and snack eating in the cinema, yay or nay? Sure, why not?
- What, if anything, do you wish someone had told you about life when you were young? I wish someone would have told me that it’s ok to make mistakes and that no one knows the answer to everything. But since no one said anything like that to me, I set the bar really high for myself…and I cleared it! Now I’m a posterchild for perfection!
- Best book you’ve read? A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle. I don’t read much, but when I do, it’s deep!
- If you could be the best at something what would it be? I would like to be the best at showing compassion. Or the best at checkers. It’s a toss up.
- What’s your favourite recipe to cook? (And please do share it.) I married a chef to keep from having to cook anymore. I’m an eater, not a cooker!
10 questions for the next 3 bloggers:
- What part of your blog would you like to improve upon?
- If you could trade places with anyone for a day, who would it be?
- Do you put the peanut butter on the bread first or the jelly?
- Name 3 famous people that you would like to meet?
- Since you’re a writer, what’s your alcoholic beverage of choice?
- What do you wish you had more of?
- Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
- Do you have a ritual to inspire your blogging? If so, what?
- What is your least favorite body part on a person?
- What is the meaning of life?
For the 3 next blogs, they all share a dad’s point of view. If you’ll notice, the 3 blogs below are a mix of funny, inspiring, and real. Just like “The Lion King” movie…
By the way…
Gavin – 18; Dad – 9 (For every award I earn, I should get a point too! Right?)
BathWriters By Alex Toys
One morning, my mom and I dropped into the local department store to give the Worm a new playground to destroy experience. In our game of hide and seek with the Worm, we stumbled upon the BathWriters set by Alex Toys. Cool, I thought. Worm is starting to show interest in writing, so we thought it would make for easy cleaning if he had the whole tub to write in, on, and around! For the price, we decided to give it a try.
BathWriters is a bath time writing set with red, blue, yellow and gold liquid markers. It even comes with a sponge to help you clean up the mess your child leaves behind! The liquid markers are essentially liquid soap and can be used to add more suds to the bathtub when your child has been soaking for hours.
There’s not much to expect from bath markers, but BathWriters does not clear the bar. Being well above the 3+ age recommendations, I decided to see how well I could write with these things. First off, the liquid soap markers are twist open. I could do that. Then I tried to write on the wall. The twist off cap closed once I made contact with the bath wall tiles. Ok, something’s wrong here. The liquid soap filled marker needs to make contact with a surface in order to write. Then why would anyone design a writing tool that stops writing when you push on the tip? I couldn’t write with it and I’m 100% sure that my toddler wouldn’t be able to use the set either.
So after playing with the markers for a few minutes longer, I figured out that I could NOT write on the wall like it shows in the picture on the box. I could only write on a horizontal surface…and I wouldn’t even call it writing. I just squeezed the liquid soap out like a squirt bottle.
BathWriters is essentially colored liquid soap packaged in 4 individual marker shaped dispensers. I was foolish enough to purchase these on a whim. The packaging made me believe fantastic things would happen…like they would actually write on the bathtub walls as advertised! Hopefully in our next game of department store hide and seek, we won’t run into these BathWriters again.
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Overall Rating: 1 Worm
Ease of Use: 1 Worm
Performance: 1 Worm
Features: 1 Worm
Durability: 1 Worm
Manliness: 1 Worm
Retail Price: $8.95
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Pros:
Pretty box.
Cons:
Boatload of chemical ingredients that are supposed to make liquid soap. Doesn’t write on vertical surfaces. Liquid just pours out of the tip and doesn’t give one the opportunity to actually write.
Things I would modify:
Redesign the entire product. There was little effort put into the actual design of this product and it shows.
Where to find:
Me vs. Gavin 